Jennifer, why are you so afraid of the nice giraffes?

Here's why:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7HCIGFdBt8

I used to love giraffes. I thought they were so sweet and gentle, with their graceful necks and long, pretty eyelashes. Then my husband and I were watching some reality clip show and came across this footage of giraffes fighting each other. I was horrified. They were so vicious, so powerful. They were freaking terrifying.

I went to bed that night, and had horrible nightmares, about being trapped in a chain link enclosure, surrounded by stalky, intelligent looking giraffes. Their movements were like the velociraptors from Jurassic Park, very fast and jerky. I woke up terrified. "But Jennifer," I told myself, "Velociraptors are extinct, and Jurassic Park was just a book."

That's when it hit me. Giraffes are very real, and most definitely not extinct.

I had a few more unsettling nightmares involving giraffes after that. And suddenly I began to see a strange trend emerge. Wherever I went after that, I began to see giraffes. At the grocery store. At the mall. In the effing airport in 3 different states.

I started to take pictures and post them in an album on Facebook as I came across them. And the album has grown bigger and bigger. So I figured I could use this space as a place to share the truth about giraffes with the world. They're vicious, bloodthirsty fighting machines. They're wolves in sheeps clothing. And they're everywhere.